I met my soul mate after I married her.
Two years ago, I met a ravishing woman at a church conference. One year ago, today, we got married.
There’s very little that can prepare you for the first year of marriage. You laugh about silly things, fight over trivial things, enjoy the simple things and bond over special things. It takes time to get used to the quirks you never knew about each other when you were dating. In the first few weeks, I woke up everyday wondering what I’d done to upset my wife. It took a while to realize that she’s just grumpy in the morning. But when it comes to quirks, I think I give her more than she bargained for. After all, what girl imagines being married to a guy who breaks wind with a sense of accomplishment?
The easy part of our first year has been fabulously simple. In the best of times, we’ve had the understated joys of swimming in the ocean, reading together in the sun, riding a scooter in Goa, getting cozy in the winter, watching the Mentalist in the evening, adopting a pair of rabbits, getting pampered by our parents, eating at Chili’s in the mall, feeding a giraffe in a Zoo, chasing sheep on a farm and stealing kisses under a windmill.
There’s a stereotypical role reversal in our home. My wife is the CEO of an organization that she brought into being. I’m the would be writer without a job. She spends five days a week in the office and I wrestle with scattered thoughts to find a pattern. She has meetings with corporate hot shots, while I hang the clothes and feed the rabbits. We share the pants in this little household.
But its the harder things that stretch you to make you stronger. The things you fight about reveal your insecurities and the way you argue reveals your weaknesses. You wonder why she’s being so unreasonable. She wonders how you can be so insensitive. Sometimes our fights move from bad to worse, dragging on like a plotless movie with terrible actors. It takes a while to say you’re sorry.
When we met, we turned the dating timeline on its head. We got married before we started dating. When we were dating, we became friends. Now we’re friends who’ve turned into soul mates. And our story is just getting started.
There’s probably nothing quite like the first year of marriage. There’ll be more anniversaries, but we’re never going to get the first one again. We’ve only been married a year, but its been a big, fat and blessed year. One we’ll hardly forget. I’m richly honored to be married to a woman who embodies all that I love and adore. She laughs even when I’m not funny and loves even though I’m quirky. I love you, Mrs. Rajkumar. Here’s to the rest of our lives. Happy Anniversary!